Emmeryn's Perch
by Tsuna 4 Cn4s
Summary: Misunderstanding, or the unwillingness to put yourself in another's position, can cause great distress in any person. Lissa tries to be a good woman - to be the equal of Emmeryn. But no one will help her; they push her down, tell her trying isn't enough, and refuse to help her grow. Eventually, Lissa needs an escape.


**Disclaimer: I do not own _Fire Emblem: Awakening._**

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><p><strong>• {Emmeryn's Perch} •<strong>

Lissa stood at the edge of the cliff, peering down at the ground so far beneath her. The wind was violent so high up, and tore at her hair and dress, threatening to throw her off balance and over the cliff. She steeled her body, determined not to fall - _If I'm going to go off, it will be on my own terms._ she told the wind.

Emmeryn had stood in this exact place only ten years before. She had felt the same wind, but a different kind of despair than Lissa felt. Emmeryn had been sorry for her brother; Lissa was sorry only for herself.

She was selfish. Or was she? Was dwelling on your own feelings selfish, or simply human? Was it contemptible or understandable? Would people - could they reach her mind and read all her secret thoughts and feelings - condemn or praise her?

Lissa shook her head, fist clenched at her side. Her finger bit into her palms, but the physical pain was weak. _Why can't I ever decide!_ she screamed, her voice exploding within her mind. _Why can't I know whether I'm right or wrong? Why won't anyone listen to me and judge me fairly? Why should I listen when you won't!_

She grabbed her hair and gave it several sharp tugs. It didn't hurt; but the abrupt motion put her off balance. Lissa teetered dangerously for a moment, before eventually regaining her footing.

Lissa fell to her knees, gasping for breath. "Death really is terrifying," she realized, surprised. "It seems so simple when it's not right in front of you. Sometimes, death seems a better alternative to life - less complicated, less painful. That's why I came up here... But now I'm backing down?"

Lissa peered over the edge again. The ground seemed even further away this time. She noticed that a crowd had started to gather a few yards from her perch, their figures mere indistinct blobs in the distance. Yet she knew they must be the Shepherds.

_Why have you all come?_ she asked, keeping her voice inside again. _I've hurt you all countless times; you've hurt me back._

One figure broke away and was running towards Lissa. _Chrom..._ she guessed, _why do you, of all people, care? We're always fighting, even now that we're all grown up. Do you remember how mean we would get as children? I couldn't stop calling you names and you couldn't stop disrespecting me. The nanny always seemed to side with you - I'm sure you were her favorite. And she would always blame me for starting the arguements, then yell and send me to my room. Yet other times she was so kind, and I thought she couldn't possibly dislike me..._

Lissa laid her hands on the rock, letting the warm, rough surface touch and console her. Tears began to drip off her chin. _Why is everything so confusing? I could never hate the nanny for blaming me, or even you for telling on me! Or whenever I did, I would feel so horrible and guilty, I thought I should die as a punishment - or as an escape. Why can I never decide? Why can no one give me the damn answers?_

"Lissa!" Chrom's voice called from somewhere behind her.

Lissa shook her head. _I can escape. It would be over in a few minutes. But I can't; death is not so comforting as the devil would like us to believe. I see that now._ Lissa looked one more time over the edge, and then slowly backed away on her knees.

_So where do I go, now?_ she asked herself, sitting on a wider part of the cliff. Chrom still hadn't reached her, but she heard him calling. _I can't go back. I can't stand all the tension. I've done so much to hurt them, so many regrets... And they just don't understand. They refuse to let me speak. They refuse to see how much I am trying - and I can't tell them._

Lissa's tears began to flow again, flooding down her cheeks. _But... would I cause them more pain by staying or leaving? I... I think I know which would be worse for me... But for them?_

"Lissa!" Chrom had reached the top. He ran to her and fell on his knees by his sister, grabbing her into his arms and hugging her tightly to his chest. He breathed heavily, and his eyes blinked rapidly. "Damn the gods if they ever let you die!" he screamed, the wind scattering his words.

Lissa said nothing as her brother held her. She remained silent as he signaled something to the Shepherds, most likely calling for the pegasi to come and fetch them.

_They want me?_ she asked, feeling suddenly very, very tired. _I guess they always did love me. So why won't they listen to me? ...I guess they just don't understand. They don't understand what that feels like. They just don't get it... But, I will stick around... and pray that one day they will understand it._

_That they will understand me._

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><p><strong>Ending Note: Short and a little fast paced; but when you can't decide something, it often is a quick back-and-forth debate. <strong>


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